Friday, May 22, 2009

Something I've Wanted to Tell You for a While

I know I'm not the best daughter in the world, but do you really have to make me feel like a failure and the worst person ever. I'm sorry I didn't get ahold of you the minute I walked in the door of my house. I figured if there was such an issue, you would have gotten ahold of me. You know my email and phone number just as well as I know yours. But why, why did you have to treat me like you did tonight? I called to talk and let you know everything was going well. Instead, you let me know how angry you are at me and you pass the phone off becuase you can't stand to hear my voice. You really hurt me tonight. I feel like I will never do anything that will make you happy.

You hate the fact that I'm not living at home or with my Grandparents. You haven't supported me in my decision to live on my own this summer, and when I call home I can hear you yelling in the background to the phone blaming the amount of debt I have on the fact that I'm renting a house for the summer. DO YOU REALZE THAT I WOULD BE IN DEBT REGARDLESS OF WHETHER I WENT TO SCHOOL IN VERMONT OR HERE?!?!?!?!?! AND MY LIVING IN BROCKPORT HAS N.O.T.H.I.N.G TO DO WITH MY DEBT!!!!!!!!!!! Just so you know, I didn't get any financial aid when I applied to schools around home either. So I would've had to take out loans there as well, and been in just as much or more debt. By the way, I love it here. Brockport feels like a home to me while your house no longer does.

I'll never be good enough or do the right things will I? Will you always say that I'm old enough to make my own decisions but then constantly let me know that I'm a disappointment because I didn't make the decision you would have liked? Every time you're angry at me, you wait a week or more so that you're boiling and then you let me know what it is I've done to deserve such wrath. Meanwhile I have no idea what you're thinking because you don't say when you're upset, so I figure everything's fine and dandy. You can be so great sometimes, but then other times you are so bipolar. I don't think you realize how much of an affect your words have on me. I'm sorry I'm such a failure as your daughter.

1 comment:

laura said...

parents stink sometimes. i feel your pain