It's Proof...People Love You

Oh birthdays. The one day a year people tend to dread the older they get, and yet it's one of the days in a year that you feel truly loved by all those around you. I'm not old enough to dread turning another year older, yet...I hear it starts around the time you reach middle age. Lol! Sometimes I forget how many people I come into contact every day and have come into contact with in my life. Facebook is a great contributor to the act of somewhat keeping in contact with those that you meet. At least friending them and then posting on each others' walls at minimum once or twice a year, that day being a birthday. Your profile page that doesn't see much action suddenly blows up with all the birthday wishes from people. Some you haven't talked to in a long time, others' you talk to frequently. Not only do you get posts on your wall on Facebook, but your pastor singles you out at a class at church to wish you good tidings in front of everyone and family gets together to just celebrate you.  And if you can't celebrate with them in person they tape your face to your little sister's Dora the Explorer doll and then video tape singing happy birthday to you as though you were there, which is shortly thereafter posted to Facebook. Close friends call and text you just so they can say it in person. Electronic cards are sent while others are mailed to you. Sometimes you get to celebrate more than once because one day isn't enough to fit everyone in. It is your day where everyone says "we're glad you were born and we love you". A day where the focus can be on you for a little bit.

I must admit that going into this day, I was not looking forward to it. Life has been rough the past couple months. The process of stretching and growing one's faith is not easy, in fact it's a lot harder than I bargained for. Even though 23 is not really that old, I am reluctant to accept that another year of my life is starting. It seemed like just yesterday I was playing with Barbies and becoming a teenager. What happened? There were things I wanted to happen in life before I got to this point that haven't. Sometimes the disappointment of that is really strong and hard to be joyful about, and life gets overwhelming. As much as I'm still unsure about being 23, I am ending the day with such gratitude towards everyone that is in my life and a tremendous feeling of being loved. I am joyful that God has placed so many people in my path, so many people that care. Birthdays are it; they're proof...people really love you.

Thursday Nights is Where its At

God has shown up so much every Thursday night Heather and I meet up to study Revelations. This past Thursday was incredible; we did something neither of us has done before. But I'll talk about that later. It's funny, even though we're (supposed) to be studying Revelations, which we do, we always end up reading/ studying something else than Revelations every time. We pretty much let God have the reigns and take us wherever He wants to show us whatever He wants us to see.

This past Thursday Heather brought up Psalm 45. There's a key word in verse 12 that puts a certain picture or definition in our minds.
           "And the daughter of Tyre will come with a gift; the rich among the people will seek your favor."
When someone tells you to seek something, what action comes to mind? Or how do you think you should act? When someone tells me that I need to seek for something I have always felt that I need to strive to find that something. That somehow it's hiding and I need to seek it out. (See how I used the word? ;-]) Well guess what, God showed us the real meaning of seeking. Psalm 45:12 reminded us of Jeremiah 29:13 - "And you seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart". After looking up the definition of the Hebrew word seek, we found something interesting. Seek doesn't mean to look for and find. The literal translation of seek is "to make oneself sick with longing for Him". This translation is from the Greek and Hebrew. So when Jeremiah says that when we seek God we will find Him, he doesn't mean to go looking for God. Jesus is right in front of you and all around you. He is ever present and literally right in front of your face. So when we are told to seek God and we will find Him, we're being told to make ourselves sick with desire for Him; to long for Him with every fiber of our being and nothing less than everything, and we will find Him. It's voluntary love. He's not hiding, our eyes and heart are just under a veil so we can't see. As we draw closer to Him and grow in our relationship with Him, He reveals more and more of Himself to us; He takes the cover off our eyes so that we may see more of who He is. His wanting us to desire Him goes back to things I talked about in my post Revelations. Seek after the Lord, desire Him with everything in you and He will show Himself to you.

Another thing we talked about was the Seraphim talked about in Revelations 4. The Seraphim are the highest ranking angels in heaven. Just a one verse in this chapter reveal so much about the four Seraphim in Heaven and how they show a true example of seeking God. Verse 8 in chapter 4 says, "The four living creatures (the Seraphim), each having six wings were full of eyes around and within. And they do not rest day or night, saying: Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come!'". First I want to point out how it says these angels are covered with eyes "around and within". It's hard to picture, but what an image it brings. The Seraphim have millions of eyes and they always see a different side of God. Second thing I wanted to point out is how the Bible says they don't rest day or night. Why would that be written unless they have the choice to rest? Unless they have the choice to leave God's throne? They are the highest ranking angels in Heaven, I have a feeling they can go pretty much wherever they want. But they don't. The Seraphim, highest honored angels, constantly sit at the feet of God worshiping Him. Their love for God is voluntary and incredibly strong. They desire to be near God so much, and just want to be in His presence that they forgo rest. They give their all to Him. A true example of how to seek.

So as we're sitting in God's evident presence we decide to go out to Wal-mart and pray for people. Even though we were both excited to go and see God move, we both had quite a bit of fear about the idea. Before we went, we spent time in prayer rebuking fear and apprehension and asking God for boldness. We had no idea what God would have in store for us that night. Our time studying God's word and truth had been so fruitful we weren't sure what else could and would happen. On the way we prayed as well, asking God if there was a particular person we needed to find and talk to. God let us know there was a particular girl we needed to talk to and so we walked into Wal-mart on a mission for God. The first lady we asked about whether she would like prayer or not was very short. She said no and walked away. Surprising unhindered by the rejection we had just received, praise the Lord, we moved on. And then we saw her. A young twenty-something aged girl doing her job. We ended up talking with her for about a half hour, just encouraging her and letting her know that God saw her and cares for her more than she can imagine. It was such a blessing to talk with this girl and share with her. Turns out she is a Christian who had a difficult day and was feeling rather discouraged. It was so amazing. God is awesome. =D

After going to the parking lot to leave, God showed up even more so in good ole Vivian (my car) than He had earlier in the night. We literally sat in the parking lot worshiping God and praying for people passing by the car for around an hour, or possibly longer. It may have looked crazy to outsiders, but we didn't care. It was so amazing to just be in His presence.