Recently someone said to me that they feel as though they are in a tug of war where they are the rope. This tug of war is a result of a decision she needs to make regarding her walk with God. Last night, on my way home, I was thinking about her and this tug of war she's in and talking with God about the situation and how to respond to her. This girl has said she's made a decision, but still feels like she's stuck in this pulling game. I was asking the Lord what wisdom I could give her about this tug of war and how to end it when He very gently told me "It won't stop til you truly let go of one side". And just like that I felt like I had gotten the most gracious slap in the face. It just hit me, the intense meaning of that statement.
So many times we have a choice to make between ourselves (i.e. our flesh) and God. Each time we linger on making a decision about our walk with God we enter ourselves into a game of tug of war. God pulls on one side desiring us to come fully to Him and whatever we are struggling with, or desires we have, or sin we're contemplating entering into, or anything that involves sacrificing our flesh pulls on the other side. Sometimes the tug of war doesn't last long, and other times it is so intense it's as if you can physically feel it.
As God showed me the meaning I almost lost it as the reality of it sank in. Not only had He given me incite concerning this girl's situation, but it was incite into so many decisions every person makes, including myself. Neither side can make you go one way or the other without you letting go because we have free will. Sometimes we say we've made a decision and have let go of one side, but still feel like we're in the game. It's because we haven't truly let go. We're still holding on with one finger. I realized we either have to let go of God or of ourselves. You choose His way or yours. This knowledge I have known in my head since I was a kid, but within a second it turned into heart knowledge. I don't know how to put into words the emotion that I felt at that moment of realization. I also know I'm not describing the meaning behind His statement the best that it needs to be because I don't know how to. He's gonna have to show you what it means to you.