Tug of War

Recently someone said to me that they feel as though they are in a tug of war where they are the rope. This tug of war is a result of a decision she needs to make regarding her walk with God. Last night, on my way home, I was thinking about her and this tug of war she's in and talking with God about the situation and how to respond to her. This girl has said she's made a decision, but still feels like she's stuck in this pulling game. I was asking the Lord what wisdom I could give her about this tug of war and how to end it when He very gently told me "It won't stop til you truly let go of one side". And just like that I felt like I had gotten the most gracious slap in the face. It just hit me, the intense meaning of that statement.

So many times we have a choice to make between ourselves (i.e. our flesh) and God. Each time we linger on making a decision about our walk with God we enter ourselves into a game of tug of war. God pulls on one side desiring us to come fully to Him and whatever we are struggling with, or desires we have, or sin we're contemplating entering into, or anything that involves sacrificing our flesh pulls on the other side. Sometimes the tug of war doesn't last long, and other times it is so intense it's as if you can physically feel it.

As God showed me the meaning I almost lost it as the reality of it sank in. Not only had He given me incite concerning this girl's situation, but it was incite into so many decisions every person makes, including myself. Neither side can make you go one way or the other without you letting go because we have free will. Sometimes we say we've made a decision and have  let go of one side, but still feel like we're in the game. It's because we haven't truly let go. We're still holding on with one finger. I realized we either have to let go of God or of ourselves. You choose His way or yours. This knowledge I have known in my head since I was a kid, but within a second it turned into heart knowledge. I don't know how to put into words the emotion that I felt at that moment of realization. I also know I'm not describing the meaning behind His statement the best that it needs to be because I don't know how to. He's gonna have to show you what it means to you.

Present Day Samson

I have always looked at Samson as the victim. The one who was seduced by Delilah and tempted time and time again until he finally gave in. But ya know what? He wasn't a victim at all. In fact he was the antagoniser. He invited everything that happened to him.

Samson was a physically strong person. Afterall, it's not everyday you find a man that can kill a thousand men with just a donkey jaw bone. God provided Samson with his strength and there was only one requirement: he was to never cut his hair. Even though Samson was really strong physically, he was very weak when it came to women. "Now Samson went to Gaza and saw a harlot there, and went into her" (Judges 16:1). Women were his downfall, or struggle. He married a woman who was not Jewish, which wasn't Jewish tradition. He gave into his struggle because it was easier than fighting against it. Sin is fun in the moment, and it's easier to give into it than to go against it. To go against sin we have to rely on God's strength and not our own, and Samson wasn't relying on God. As a result, he told his precious secret to a woman who's virtue was less than admirable. He invited the pain and sorrow that came with giving away his secret. His sin caught up with him and dragged him far away from God.

We are just like Samson sometimes. There are struggles we have in our lives where we can choose to give into them or fight against them with God's strength. Friday night, Chad and Rob talked about us being Samson. There are things we hold onto and feel like we can't live without. They are addictions of strong desires that we don't give up to God. Eventually those same things we feel we can't live without will destroy us, just like it did Samson.

I have definitely had my Samson seasons. Times where I couldn't let go of something I thought I couldn't live without. Where I was relying on my own strength instead of God's. Some of those times, it almost destroyed me just as it did Samson.

"With Him are strength and sound wisdom..." Job 12:16a

"For You have girded me with strength for battle; You have subdued under me those who rose up against me." Pslam 18:39

"The Lord is their strength, and He is a saving defense to His annointed." Psalm 28:8

"You will pull me out of the net that they have secretly laid, for You are my strength." Psalm 31:4

"But the slavation of the righteous is from the Lord; He is their strength in time of trouble." Psalm 37:39

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalm 73:26

"Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His face continually." Psalm 105:4

"Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary." Isaiah 40:31